W…T….F Work?

Nobody likes to work, it’s pretty clear.  You wake up from very comfortable sleep in a (maybe not so) comfortable bed, wondering what awaits you when you hear the sound of clocking in.  If yours doesn’t make a sound, well….shuttup, I really wasn’t asking.  

In fact, I make it a habit not to ask anyone anything opinionated at work. As if work isn’t enough out of my day, in that the very last thing anyone should hear is the irreparable mind-shit sludge that begins to invade my ears.  Including the following:

  • Gay Marriage
  • Your favorite sports team (The Detroit Lions suck, get a clue)
  • Politics
  • Religion
  • “Right” and “Wrong”

The mere fact that you haven’t been able to recognize an appropriate time, place, or platform to voice an opinion relating one of the many subjects (I may have failed to include) makes you simply…a fucktard.  A genius combination of being a “fuck” and a “retard.”


Recognize the obviousness that you can never convince anyone of anything….ever. because we’re always right….right? Wrong!

When you hear retorts that include

  • “Really? nooo really?” (you can swap out for “seriously?!”)
  • “I don’t give a shit what youuuu think”
  • <—- *insert fucktard response here*
  • <— and here….

That response isn’t rhetorically comical or genuine in any way…period. Your inability to plan ahead when someone more intelligent than you interjects a plausible idea, is just another reason for you to take that opinion and firmly place it…into your rectum.

If someone was truly asking you for your opinion, it typically starts with something like..”Hey, what do you feel about this?”  From there it hopefully is a discussion of intellectual ideas that make you not wanna punch kittens square in the mouth…it certainly isn’t an overwhelming feeling of gut-wrenching silence, as the only thing you’re actually thinking, is what you aren’t saying. 


I would award you with a medal of honor for “shutting the hell up,” but I was raised properly in that you aren’t merited for having a damn brain.  



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